A Mom's Version of "Royals"

You can view the original song  here

Apologies to Lorde, a parody of "Royals",  by a suburban mom.

I have a diamond on my flesh
I cut my teeth on a wedding ring in 2006.
And I'm proud of my address,
In a suburb town, no local envy.

But every song's like gold teeth, grey goose, trippin' in the bathroom
Blood stains, ball gowns, trashin' the hotel room,
We don't care, we're drivin minivans in our dreams.
But everybody's like Crystal sleeping with who now and who's the sitter
Airplanes, meetings, Tigers in the Boy Scouts.
We don't care, we aren't caught up in your love affair.

And we name our kids after royals (royals).
It don't run in our blood
That kind of luxe just ain't for us.
We crave a different kind of buzz
Let me be your ruler (ruler),
You can call me queen Bee
That baby I'll rule, and nurse, and rule, and nurse.
Let me live that fantasy.

[Verse 2]
Mom friends and I—we've cracked the code.
We count our dollars on the carpool to the party.
And everyone who knows us knows, that we're fine with this,
We didn't come for Barney.

But every song's like gold teeth, grey goose, trippin' in the bathroom
Blood stains, ball gowns, trashin' the hotel room,
We don't care, we're drivin minivans in our dreams.
But everybody's like Crystal sleeping with who now and who's the sitter
Airplanes, meetings, Tigers in the Boy Scouts.
We don't care, we aren't caught up in your love affair.

And we name our kids after royals (royals).
It don't run in our blood
That kind of luxe just ain't for us.
We crave a different kind of buzz
Let me be your ruler (ruler),
You can call me queen Bee
That baby I'll rule, and nurse, and rule, and nurse.
Let me live that fantasy.

Ooh ooh oh
Our van's bigger than we ever dreamed,
And I'm in love with being queen.
Ooh ooh oh
Life is great with every care
We aren't caught up in your love affair.

And we name our kids after royals (royals).
It don't run in our blood
That kind of luxe just ain't for us.
We crave a different kind of buzz
Let me be your ruler (ruler),
You can call me queen Bee
That baby I'll rule, and nurse, and rule, and nurse.
Let me live that fantasy.

You can view the original song here. 

Again, my apologies to Lorde.

So God Made A Farmer....

Last weekend we visited our family farm. My husband helped my dad put wood into the barn, my kids ran and screamed their hearts out, we all got a little sun, fired some of our firearms and enjoyed some fresh air.

As Paul Harvey said, "So God made a farmer..."I need somebody with arms strong enough to wrestle a calf and yet gentle enough to deliver his own grandchild"

Our four year old (Sean) shouted, "I'M A FARMER!" Thinking he was helping Daddy and Papa move the wood from the trailer to the barn and fixing the hay baler.

Yes, son. You are. Because being a farmer isn't in having the same last name that is tied to the land, but having put in the work. THAT is what ties you to the land. Being a farmer is in his blood. I am a proud farmer's daughter and, if he so chooses, a proud mother of a farmer.

To quote Paul Harvey, "Somebody who'd bale a family together with the soft strong bonds of sharing, who would laugh and then sigh, and then reply, with smiling eyes, when his son says he wants to spend his life 'doing what dad does.'"

So God made a farmer.

Edit...Their Great Grandmother would be proud.

Bowman For Waukee

As many of you know, I am running for the Waukee School Board. If you live in the Waukee School District, I hope I can count on your vote on September 10th.

Today, I have released my list of endorsements. Endorsements you ask? Yes.

I know some may think "it's only a school board race. Why have endorsements?"

To me, it's not "only a school board race." It's the future of our children and our society.

You can read my endorsements below. 

August 27, 2013 

For Immediate Release

Contact Sarah Bowman

Bowman For School Board Announces Endorsements

Waukee, Iowa- Sarah Bowman, Candidate for Waukee School Board has been endorsed by Community Leaders and Parents in the Waukee School District. “I am overwhelmed by the encouragement and support of my neighbors, fellow parents, members of Church and community leaders in the Waukee School District,” Bowman said. 

“I’ve had the pleasure of knowing Sarah Bowman for quite a few years. I’ve watched her drive, determination, work ethic and dedication to her children. Sarah would be an asset to the Waukee School Board.” –Chris Hagenow, State Representative

“Sarah Bowman would be a great addition to the Waukee School Board. She has four boys under the age of 8 and is fully invested in their education. I believe that she is the face of Waukee, a young and informed mother. I plan on voting for Sarah Bowman on September 10^th.” –Chad Airhart, Dallas County Recorder

“I’ve had the pleasure of knowing Sarah Bowman for the last 11 years and I’ve met her four children. She is a dedicated mother and citizen. She would be a great addition to the Waukee School Board.” –Becky Beach

“I want to publicly endorse Sarah Bowman for Waukee School Board. Sarah’s motives for running are in the right place. She loves her kids and cares for the future. With Sarah sitting on the Waukee School Board, I know my own children’s education will be taken seriously. The school will be held accountable for fiscal responsibility. I will vote for Sarah Bowman on September 10^th.” –Shane Blanchard, Waukee City Councilman

“I’ve been impressed with the work Sarah has done for her community. I know she’ll focus on making sure the district provides high quality education and keep students’ best interests at heart. “ Charles Schneider, State Senator 

“I wholeheartedly endorse Sarah Bowman for Waukee School Board. Sarah will bring both her intellect and her common sense to every decision needing to be made. Our school systems need great leaders and great advocates for children and family. I am endorsing Sarah as a decisive leader and a committed wife and mother.” –Jeff Mullen, Pastor, Point of Grace Church in Waukee and Father of two in the Waukee School District

“Sarah Bowman understands what the Waukee School district needs. She has four boys under the age of 8, she’s a hard worker and dedicated to her commitments. The Waukee School District would benefit from her education, life experience and work ethic.” Rob Taylor, State Representative

 “I’ve known Sarah for 12 years and watched her grow from a young professional and popular blogger to an impassioned mom of 4 boys, who, like all of us, wants a top quality educational experience not only for her children, but all children in the Waukee School District! Sarah is a researcher, communicator and implementer and will bring and encourage the best of ideas and solutions to the Waukee School District. –Cathy Sorensen, Mom of 2, hopeful Grandma of many!

***

I Am Me.

The best part about knowing me, political or not, is when I say I am going to do something, I do it.

I had a child out of wedlock (being pro-life).

I stayed true to my vows when my husband was serving in Iraq.

I saved a barn.

I teach Faith Formation because I believe that children should be exposed to the love of Jesus. 

I try to save taxpayers money by exposing fraud.

I hunt ghosts, because I believe all spirits should face their final destination.

I nurse(d) all of my kids from birth until they self wean.

What you see is what you get.

Love me or hate me, I am real.

First Day, Last Day, First Grade

I can't believe it. I'm a mom of a second grader. When did that happen? It seems just yesterday I was 10 days overdue and going to the hospital to be induced. At that point, I thought I was going to be pregnant with William (Liam) forever.

He just finished his last day of first grade. He has made me so proud already. He was my rock, my buddy, my friend, when he was only 1.5 when Daddy deployed. He grew up, faster than any 2 year old should have to during that year.

He made an impression on his preschool teacher, so much so, that she and I are still friends on Facebook.

He voluntarily participated in a Science Fair last year AND this year.

He earned more "golden tickets" for going above and beyond in his classroom than I can count.

He loves his Faith Formation classes and can't wait for next year when he receives the Sacraments of Reconciliation and First Communion.

He's a great big brother and handles change well. Including the arrival of three younger brothers.

He is such a good kid. He is so smart, so funny, so clever.

But in Second Grade? How? When?

I tried to pick out clothing that he would fit into so we could have "bookend" pictures for the first day and the last day. As you can imagine, his first day was busy, because after we put him on the bus, we dropped his younger brothers off at Grandma's house and welcomed Baby Harry that afternoon.

As kids do, his shorts no longer fit, his shoes no longer fit, but his shirt does.

I can't believe how he's grown, how much has changed in our family, in just one school year.

It was rather bright that morning. Next year I'll try to get a picture without the little brothers.

Last day. New shorts, new shoes...but my, how he's grown.

Monday, Monday...

It's a Monday. While I was nursing Harry, B and I were watching "Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood".  Sean was getting dressed.

Suddenly, B was tapping my arm. I looked over at him, he had tears streaming down his face and I could tell he was choking.

I put Harry in the bouncer and grabbed B (in one "mom swoop"). I gave B the Heimlich and smacked his back. He puked all over the floor and a penny came up. Thank goodness for my lifeguard training!!

While I was tending to B, calling Ma'am (my mom) and making him drink water to see if his throat was sore, Sean went out into the garage. I went to see what he was doing, and as soon as I opened the door, I hear, "I so, so, sorry."

Yep. Pee. In the garage. Again. This is the second time he's felt the urge to pee in the garage. I asked him why he did it and he said, "I don't know, Mommy. I so, so sorry."

One choking, one peeing...all before 11 AM.

Garfield was so spot on... 

But at least it is over with, right??